--!_.-*-._jaclyn_.-*-.

Friday, April 02, 2010

__I've Finally Found You__

It was not my intention to be like that. It was not on purpose either. I just don't know why I always have uneasy feeling when I hear you saying that you're going out, without me. Damn. Am I so possessive? Over-sensitive? I seriously hate myself for this.

To you:
When you asked me if I have anything to say, I have so much to say. I don't know what made me say that I have nothing to say. Probably, I'm afraid that I might cry if I talk to you face-to-face. I'm bad at expressing myself, that's why I decided to keep quiet. In fact, I wanted to tell you that I am indeed upset. For the times you went out, it was informed last minute and I have the thinking that you enjoyed with your friends much more than me. I trust you so much that I'm afraid of getting hurt. I'm afraid you'd leave me one day. Look, this is really not on purpose because the feelings came just like that. I had to console myself while trying to get started on my final year project. I had to console myself when I am trying to sleep, and worst of all, I even had to console myself when I wake up. I have to tell myself that everything will be fine, nothing will go wrong. At least the lucky thing I know is that you did not go out and drink, or else it will be even worse. I don't deny if I am possessive and over-sensitive. When I'm awake, you're asleep. When I'm asleep, you're awake. When I wanted to talk to you, something seem to make me choke on my words and tadah, I had to give up on it. I cannot take big blows. I cannot stand loneliness. I really don't know what else I can do anymore.

On a brighter note: Darling and I took this using my sister's polaroid. Sweet? =D

[<-pRiNcEsSpiNky->] dreaming of my prince charming...|1:53 AM|